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+4 votes
*Warning: This is a little long.* So, my mom and I have pretty similar tastes, and up to this point, planning has been easy... until yesterday. We were talking about food and I told her I didn't want to go with salmon for the main entree because my FI doesn't like fish. And her answer was "well... we can decided on that later." WTH?! I want to involve my mom and my parents are paying for the wedding, but I mean, if the groom doesn't like a certain food, shouldn't it be assumed that no debate is needed for NOT having that? I'm worried now that she's going to start trumping my ideas because she said "Well, this is mine and your father's reception as well because it's a party we're hosting." ..... ARE YOU KIDDING ME?! I don't even know how to answer that!
Location: New York City, New York

asked Aug 13, 2013 in Managing Family and Friends by megan12

4 Answers

0 votes
Ouch! Sounds like she is really excited about the wedding and not realizing that she may be crossing a line....If your FI doesn't like fish then don't have it at the wedding...bottom line. Stick up for your ideas and incorporate her in areas that you both agree upon. At the end of the day it is your wedding, just remember she is excited and may not realizing that she is "trumping your ideas." Good luck!

answered Aug 14, 2013 by Distressed Bride
+1 vote
One of the best ways to handle interference is to tell others that "someone else knows your vision and is handling those details". It is up to you if you want to tell them you will share their request.

answered Aug 20, 2013 by Rev.DanLatour(helpful expert)
0 votes
Reaffirm that your fiancé hates fish. Explain that it makes him sick to his stomach and that you do not want your new husband sick on his wedding day! Fish can be less expensive than other pricey meats, but how about a 2nd entrée like sliced ham or chicken kabobs as a 2nd choice?

answered Aug 20, 2013 by charlestonweddingphotographers(expert)
0 votes
It is traditional for the bride's family to pay for the wedding and provide a budget for the wedding but it is NOT traditional for the Moms to control what is decided. The things all your guests need are put into perspective when compared to what you and your fiancé need. A creative suggestion if this gets hot between you and your mom.....have two or three choices for main entrée so your fiancé doesn't have to eat fish. Another one is to have a special meal prepared just for your fiancé. He deserves the best on this day and if it costs more to have a personalized and served dinner for him/her than do it!! It'll make her mad but her "hosting" duties ideally will be the ones you decide she is in control of. That doesn't help for an overbearing mother who has been dreaming of how exactly this day shall be since you were a small girl but this is YOUR day not hers.

answered Aug 22, 2013 by DJ Dave(expert)